This last time on tuesday he showed up with a gash in the side of his cheek and bruising on his head and temple. And for this county that I live in they had to go and pick on one of the ONLY good mothers my age; seriously, everyone my age is strung out and even selling their kids meds etc for drugs and I dont do anything accept put them first and try to get through college! Those of us who suffer much will benefit in the end. I would suggest you finding a project you can do for your kids & start collecting things to give to them when they return. Too many people get to judge me when they are worse parents than Ive ever been and I just feel very alone. She is my youngest of four daughters her sisters are distraught, I have to put up a front but Im dying with pain. The effects of grief after the loss of a mother are different for everyone . She is struggling with severe clinical depression and suicidal thoughts and has written an article describing how she feels. Also, the psychologist will write out some useful recommendations picked up individually for each patient. A loss is tragic at any age, but the sense of unfairness of a life . I totally understand your pain , grief and heartache. So please get out your Bible and read these stories! We may not see justice until Eternity, but justice will be made. 187-214). My heart is beyond broken. Also, maybe (if you havent already) you can join a church. Im going through a similar thing now because someone was a trigger happy dss caller (although I believe her goal WAS for me to lose my kids bc she also called the actual police with horrendous accusations). You might have lost your child because of your separation or divorce from your spouse, or it could be because of other issues that have deemed you an unfit parent. !..I did not..now my daughter will never know me or her brothers and sister !!!!!!!!! They can help. Candy, your posting touched me deep down, and brought tears to my eyes because youre doing all the things I would hope any TPRed parent would do. It is terrible and nearly unbearable, but we have to get through it. Wouldnt they want you to be doing something to make your life better, like more education so you could get a better job? So I hope youll pull yourself together and stay with what you know is the truth but consider things from your sons point of view. I cannot even write for this website unless I get enough sleep the night before. You may be more prone to viral infections, such as colds. document.getElementById( "ak_js_3" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. Put everything you want to say on a piece of paper and then burn it. The psychological effects of child custody battles surface in a number of other waysfrom acting out to trouble sleeping to child custody depressionand do vary based on the age and maturity of the child. If not, call me at 816-645-4152. I recommend some self help books for these issues. You might also notice some physical symptoms of aches and pains. I had to remain on Suboxone or Subutex for my entire pregnancy because of the risk of withdrawal causing preterm labor or miscarriage. So sorry for what happened in your life, Jean. Probably the last thing hed want to learn is that his dad gave up and ended his life before a relationship was even possible. Required fields are marked *. In this article we will discuss the emotional distress that comes with losing custody of your child. Call me at three six zero 480 five one one four. Its been so hard and worse than ever because this time I have anxiety/panic attacks about losing the kids! You are going through one of the most traumatic things a mother can go through. You are not alone and there is always help. Im still waiting on my two other babies but that will take probably another year or two wen theyre 18. ??? I'm willing to help in any way." Offer silence. It is terrible to not be able to be with your own children, the children God gave you. I am in alot of heartache and could really use sound advice. They moved my kids 2 & a half hours away. I hope this helps you. CPS had been called on her before we had the chance to get it all cleaned up. I have been waiting to get the job I worked so hard for but because I have this founded case on my record cps has to verify and sign a paper and I have been waiting 2 months. We are not held accountable by God for the actions others choose evil against us, or our children. I cant get past it. i recently relapsed and i want to go back treatment immediately but im afraid will hurt my case. The tears I cry for you each day could surely fill a cup. I have 100% guaranteed childcare just feet away 24/7.. Never give up on them. If you do suffer from depression and want to seek custody, its important to get as much solid, medical evidence as possible. The painting and sawing and all that would be messy, but then in the end, what a beautiful house it is! The psychologist, having studied the problem, can advise you to take a vacation, return to work, do your favorite thing. I have been battling this now for 6 months i have no family in TN besides my father who is too sick to help i have few friends. Symptoms of divorce-related depression can include any, or a combination of, the following: Symptoms of depression can vary from mild to extremely severe. The nature of each disorder is vastly different. I hope you write me back!! Even though she attempted to recant, CPS bullied her into moving forth on the allegation. I became a heroin addict when my pain control Dr died of cancer. Despair hang on you will be made stronger by the grief you live through. I think back to my relationship with my mother and I think of my favorite memories and they are not the ones that happened before I was 18. but dont know if I can get enough people to sine.. does anyone eles have one going? They are my world and life without, just doesnt work. Very loved, I pray every day that i could go back and change the mistakes I made. Go to a mental health place and tell them you have anxiety from your kids being taken and beg for their help dont stop till they help they cant refuse you. We were, as a family serving God when the State legally kidnapped my children by lying and twisting and exaggerating the truth until it was unrecognizable. I would be supervised 24/7 by qualified people ensuring my daughters safety. We have to ADJUST. I dont know what to do! Monica has years of experience working with families in transition. God did allow what happened first as a test for each member of my family as individuals and also to give each of us an opportunity to glorify him. He was taken when he was eleven months old. Even though her cases are due to her real problem, she certainly is depressed over losing her kids. Im so lost in my own feelings & I feel my heart will never heel. You are grieving. My kids were taken over two months ago because my daughter said I yelled too much. I sang back-up in a band doing punk and glam songs. Mickalyn, keep trying. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Cps became involved in my life when my only child was 21months. Educate yourself to understand parenting in the context od divorce, Ensure that the stress does not get ot the child. God never makes mistakes, and he is never unjust. I have no pets and no diapers or food is ever left on my floor. One factor that you may not have considered is depression and child custody. I used my depression to my advantage by turning it into anger. Red flag. It could also be a symptom of depression. I am here to help. The Bible says for now we see through a glass darkly. 1 Corinthians 13:12. Usually they come around when they see that nobody else in the world can replace the unconditional love they were getting from their mom. Because even though they are without you right now, they are not without God. How he went to the bathroom!! I am just so tired of everything. Its a test god is placing these children in adoption parents arms they are not allowed to steal the child because somebody in authority takes it back off them for being cheeky and greedy, I feel the same my family was ripped apart it hurts so bad to dream of your kids and wake up and u cant touch them. I didnt care about anything. Should being the operative word of course. I wasnt a perfect parent, but I wasnt a bad one either. Im so tired not only did they take children they made my husband leave the home and move out right when we left the hospital. We all have problems. I do not know what route to take as I was told by an attorney if I try to go up the chain of command that it could possibly back fire on me and upset the workers. Depression is the most common mental illness in America, and millions of people suffer from bouts of depression, especially after a traumatic experience like a divorce, a job loss, a death in the family or financial stress. this pain guilt and empty feeling is stifling what do i do? Hello Ashley, I write this to you because God may have taken them for a reason. They were taken almost 2 months ago and they cant even spend the night with me. I am going through this same thing right now. If you do you can be charged with molestation. They say they are protecting the kids but really theyre hurting them more. The idea that the relationship between you and your child will change following a seperation with your spouse or due to other issues can be distressing. Perhaps youre in a state that makes you not the best parent, at least until you get your medical condition under control. Teens. I live in Tennessee I went to visit my mother in New York and during the time that i had gotten stuck there (5 months) her father and grandmother had decided to write a bunch of stuff in a petition and get temporary custody of her so that i could not bring her back to tennessee. Im not a dietitian and I think you might not like my food choices (all vegetarian) but I know that avoiding things like sugary sodas and drinking vegetable juice instead is a good step toward better health. If you continue to use this website without changing your cookie settings or you click "Accept" below then you are consenting to this. People never believe me when I explain things they just say Im lying and cps would never do that. She defended him! God has a plan in all of this! Youll need an accurate diagnosis of your condition, symptoms, and the treatment you undergo for depression. If you are not suffering you are probably not saved. Depression: Changes to your relationship with your child may leave you feeling sad, hopeless or depressed. I have no money or strength left to fight! I am at fault for my situation. First name only. To several children. If you or your acquaintances need help, this article may be useful to you. Gods going to fight for all good parents who have had there hearts ripped out by all of the many rotten cps agents! I dont know why I am even sane myself. Let us take a look at some steps you can take to help yourself. I cant go on any further, too much pain. Our lives dont always work out the way we wish. Im pulling for you to get your kids back soon. I know I am not patient. Several theories have been put forward to explain this reaction, and they described seven stages of grief. How to jump through their hoops even though they lied. Jen, Im so so sorry to hear of your TPR I hope you will appeal. Jon Vaughn, Contributor. My only child, a precious little girl was stolen from me September of 2015 after a nasty bout of post partum depression. I later found my older son- age 28- on his knees in my room screaming and crying also. Some kind of belief system will help you find meaning in all this mess. Depression: Changes to your relationship with your child may leave you feeling sad, hopeless or depressed. My kids were born healthy cps was listening to the lie of my X In-Laws. I am forever wounded. My son is 13, the age where he can say where he wants to be, but the judge in this hearing wont let him testify. Its the worst feeling in the world to be hopeless & to not know where to turn because your stuck. Thats a good way to look at it, Shirley. My mother, even in her eighties, found a lot of joy in volunteering to sit at a desk in the lobby of her local hospital to answer questions when people came in. Do not turn to drugs or alcohol for comfort because they will only drag you down to the abyss. I have a broken phone reading up on all this and I am so lost. Leave a message there if you need too. I am basically left in limbo fishing to find out what is going on as no one is returning phone calls or text (case worker) or (supervisor). . financial distress form california. Good luck with your work. But soon after the mother began allowing their male child identified in legal documents as "L." to . Now Im a better person and I could be a better mother to my children. I lost my 11 by year old son almost 5 years ago. Your experience of losing the custody of your child is the same as any other kind of loss you might experience. Psalm 131:1, 2 says, Lord, my heart is not haughty, nor mine eyes lofty: neither do I exercise myself in great matters, or in things too high for me. He knows your pain and most of all, He knows your heart. Paul, I dont know any legal remedies for anyone in your situation. Lucinda I pray that you and your mother will get along well enough together that she will eventually loosen up and let you see your children, and even have them in your home for extended visits as they are growing up. But the case has been going on for so long, if the children are with their fathers now the judge will probably want to keep them in a stable place. No response of course. What do I do??? They called me and I went to pick my precious grandchild up. Amber, I guess they dont like people hiring attorneys and disputing what they say. CPS also made my husband divorce me! I hate cps. He never forces his way into anyones life. Xoxo. The scientific basis of child custody decisions (2nd ed., pp. For the record I have never cussed or acted in a nasty immature way at all towards them and I have supported them and trusted them to be professional. It can also become difficult for you and your child to adjust to these changes, the fact that your child has been taken from you and that you no longer have access to them can be an excruciating experience. I was in so much shock i couldnt even give an emotion in that moment. I lost everything but the clothes on my back. My children were never abused and always with their mom prior. It takes a lot of time and effort to overcome your grief. Now my grandchild is in the system and I am told I am not grandma. My granddaughter told me that her foster dad was putting a pillow over her face in her bed I reported this as advised by a child advocacy group to report it to the state police in the foster familys county . My milk is drying up as I avidly nursed my 9 month old. Moving forward after losing the custody of your child can seem impossible but it is a necessary step. I believe that my God allowed this for a reason. The case worker even brought the kids here and said she had no issues at all but yet I am still jumping through hoops. If I lose my battle for my kids, I am going to fight that much harder. There's no right or wrong amount of time to grieve the passing of your mother. I contacted an attorney that supposedly fights dcfs cases and his response was go and leave your daughter at a Dcfs location so they wont charge you. It is so much better for them to be with your mom rather than in an adoption out to strangers. My husband and I were separated, yes i am a victim of abuse, yes I had an drug addiction b4, yes I was grieving I lost my youngest childs identical twin sister three days after they were born. Cps keeps adding layers of trauma to everyone. I know I am not the only one who has unfairly had their child taken, but I feel like I am completely alone. This has hurt me beyond the death on any relative or friend I have ever had to deal with. It is hard for me to do this. My daughter is now with her father and adopted by his wife. Nothing is yours. Keep doing the next right thing. I do not know if that is good. The fight in a Mom for her babies, is one i wouldnt wish on my worst enemy. i became homeless due to i could not be in my home where my lil guy stayed and still is with ex. Working in a period of deep grief after the death of a child can only be a burden. And as for the others, if they are with your mom, thats better than in foster care. We were an hour from being discharged and they stole him. Ask for others to pray for you too. Winter consider the future. You might believe you don't measure up to other people in terms of looks, age, or weight. She was a preachers daughter and I prayed for God to do what was best for my children and they were gone. SHOW ME THE WAY! Thank you so much for writing. I had no choice, I felt it was the best for them. Im now 49 they are 29 and 30. I have been in and out of hospitals for suicidal ideation. I made this as an expression of my story. Staying busy & putting something in their trunk each month helps. If you do not find understanding among loved ones, start communicating on the Internet. The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not want. Psalm 23. Do you have a lawyer who can help you regain custody of your children? It isnt just women! 3. my daughter has shown up with marks as well that were not simply from them being kids. Although the mental illness alone does not automatically disqualify you from custody, an active co-occurring drug addiction might. Are able to sympathize with your situation, Have experience handling similar cases and situations, and. Im walking away from mine. You DO have a future. Stopping contact with a child after losing custody is the worst decision. Maybe this is an idea you could take to your state legislators. There are certain treatments for depression, but there is no specific treatment for grief, but counseling can be beneficial. Make sure you study your states social services regulatory laws and also be aware of your civil rights. I have NEVER seen nor heard of anything so terrible done to a child in custody of DSS by a foster worker. 2. Read your bible. Good luck. I have read the last chapter. Why are they allowed to abuse parents and kids. After losing a child, parents may find themselves experiencing shock, denial, anger, depression, hopelessness, guilt, isolation, disorganized thoughts, feelings of acceptance, and/or a host of other possible thoughts and feelings. I truly hope that you get your children back from the scum! people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. John 3:19, I have three boys 6/4/an two months old baby,I just feel cps is taking vantage of my rights with my children, I have my own place to stay in my two bedroom apartments, I wish someone out there could help me what Ive been threw with cps, an also cps says I dont know my Cognitive, Cps check me for criminal back an domestic violence, My Record Clean an I dont have any Domestic violence, Im Am Not a Violence person im calm, an im am a Very happy mother would love will take responsibility for my three lovely Children boys, two of my older boys is bonded with me have great good healthy Relationship together, my boys talk good amazing things about me, cus I know Deep an down in my heart, im am a Good great compassion mother, I lm not giving up on my three children They need there mother an I need them, I will do everything in my own power to get my three Boys Back, Cps is Corrupted just has well atty public defender like to Pretend Represent U, Im Looking Forward to Hire Atty is Gonna Fight real Hard against Cps Workers on Case,cps workers make me Suffer a whole alot cps dont e even give me a Chance with my three children boys, an one of my boys have to have 7 stitches on his head now its a scar for life I have to see he my 4 year old son, my Six year son have bruises all over his Body, my oldest son told me that the foster Parents told both of my boy if they dont tuck his shirt in his pants that both of my boys will get spanked with belts on there bottom or Back an I was Upset cus I dont spank my children,I pray of God blessed me hard has he can Help me get my three babies Back, thank you. They were good young boys they didnt deserve what th ey got. DSS is not what I thought they were. depression after losing custody of childtown of hamburg personnel department. Yet I can never share my shameful past. I give my God the glory, anyway. Hi,my name is tammy, my kids was taken from me, when I was treated myself depression, I left my kids with my mother an cps came in an took my kids away cus cps saying I have mental illness an I dont, I talk to doctors an counselor, I told them I live on my owned apartment two bedroom an everything is new in home, cps never once out of the Whole year check my places to say I was stable, cps work against me an lie about me, that im on drugs, cps check me for drugs I came out clean,on june 4th I came out dirty once for opiate I have prescription for vicodin for my illness in my vaginal infection,cps say I have addiction an I dont they send to some programs at last min before my service was terminated, on Sept,19,2013, now cps is trying to Terminate my perinatal rights on March 28,2014 in the mean I did came up pregnant just had a boy inon December 9th 2013, how ever cps gave Temporary Custody to the baby father hes illegal, he has no paper he live in basement with my baby, he dose drugs marijuana, he works, an everything, cps gave my baby to baby father nolvin his name, he begged me to Help him with my baby kuz he didnot know what to do, baby father live in Pittsburgh, me I live in Modesto baby father pay for my Ticket send threw western union every weekend, I show the baby father how to parents are baby, but tbaby father wouldnt listen to me, all he wanna do is drink beer get drunk an high, now mine U of cps feel that father no need in service but Only the mother wich they provide me service an not the father,father says he needed my Help cus he told me he cant stand the baby cry,cus my baby keep crying alot,this month feb,25 [emailprotected] is court hearing,if you any concerns contact me (925)23eight-5nine32 my name tammy thank you. 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