Photo: @tim-douglas (modified by author) 1. Discover short videos related to roasts to say to your friend on TikTok. You'll think I'm crazy until you should see me with my best friend. Remember, however, that the best insults are not the ones that are intended to offend. Its just that there is only so much stupid information I can process in one go. Can you go back there? The last time I saw something like you I flushed. I know because I live with you, youre naturally way dumber than that. Is there an app I can download to make you disappear? Continue with Recommended Cookies. In between, one friend tells you give me a joke. Im sorry you got offended that one time you were treated the way you treat everyone all the time. Its my favorite. You should wear a condom on your head. How do you find Will Smith in the snow? I mean, my middle finger gets a boner every time it sees you! It reminded me to take out the trash. I bet your face would melt if I put a candle to it, because all it is, is plastic! Cut off your head. I dont want to be mean, but babe, my hair straightener is hotter than you are. I cant risk giving birth to someone that ugly. All my love to you. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off. Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you. All mistakes are fixable, yet you arent. I am simply giving you time to reflect on what an idiot you are being. Don't sound awful. Instead, you should use them as inspiration for your own barbed observations. Its scary to think people like you are allowed to vote. There is nothing better than coming home from work and slipping into a pair of sweats or pajamas. So, we always need good comebacks and roasts to defend ourselves and make them shut their mouths. But as long as you dont take yourself too seriously and just have fun, you cant go wrong. 8. Only roast your close friends who understand your humour. You wouldnt want your roast to fall flat on its face at the first insult, would you? These are jokes I've collected over the years. What kind of cereal do dads like? If youre looking for great jokes to tell your friends to make them laugh, then look no further. No matter how many times you roll your eyes, you wont find anything in your head. 28. Here are 14 super funny jokes that are sure to make your friends laugh out loud. I told them, Just you wait! 14. Your ass is so fat, your asshole is mistaken for the blackhole. 2. Nobody wins in this battle. A liar 5. While arguing with your friend, you need backup roasts on your defense. If you want to be the master of throwing good roasts, then you have to learn to go in hard, fast, and without mercy. 3. And the best part of our relationship is the fact that you are no longer in it. It would be a great day If you used a glue stick instead of Chapstick. I don't think you're un-intelligent. More vocabulary. Give me a minute; Im trying to think of an insult thats dumb enough for you to understand!View in gallery. When God made you, you must have been on the bottom of his to-do list. If you ever feel suicidal, at least you can jump off your own ego. But youve no one to take care of you. Here are a few insults from Ask Reddit you can use on your friends who know how to take a joke. 1 Best Comebacks for when You're Being Hit on: If a guy pulls the "dream" pickup line, give the comeback, "Really cause this feels like a nightmare." "I'm no proctologist, but I know an asshole when I see one." If a guy asks you where you've been all his life, simply say, "Living mine." Ever meet a guy who's trying to be smooth . But on the surface, you're just giving a smart reply that makes them look, and possibly feel stupid. Denim denim denim, 7. You were so happy for the negativity of your Covid test, we didnt want to spoil the happiness by telling you it was IQ test. Whenever you open your mouth, its like, Woah, somebody took too many drugs this morning.. Our review board ensures that our content is accurate and up to date. Hey, you have something on your chin.. no, the 3rd one down. Please don't post them on other sites! 1 Favorites. If anything, you want your good roasts to be met with good comebacks because that helps to further strengthen the bonds between you. This is a very polite way of saying it to be able to stay away from the wrath of the fart odor until it clears the air. Anytime when I need guidance, I take your advice and do the opposite. 11. You might just find one. Follow on Twitter or read more. 11. Thanks for letting me know what is like to have a fake friend. Poking a little fun at a friend or co-worker during a roast or hangout can give everyone a good laugh, especially if the person being roasted is a good sport. Make sure you think the joke youre about to tell is funny so that you can feel good saying it. Crazed Rabbit (Banned) Apr 13, 2016 @ 9:23am. I am using almost all of these roasts in a rap!!!! 8. Reality, 4. Im just giving myself a head start. your so dumb if we put you in a competition vs a baby the baby will win, Okay, my fatness can be fixed but your ugliness can't. Bison 8. I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in awhile, but youre really abusing that privilege. #7. 5. It might be that your ex was a complete (insert rude word here), or that you're annoyed for not noticing the obvious and allowing yourself to be messed around. CRY YOURSELF A RIVER, BUILD A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT!!! I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm. then when the doctor told her it was hers, she cried. I keep thinking you cant get any dumber and you keep proving me wrong. So, here are some of the behavioral or personality-related roasts that are so clean it may shut your friend up. 74. Spoiled milk 9. If its about a friendly argument or to tease your bestie, you need some funny roasts to tell your friends from school or college. Bro, youre awesome. Mongo's coffees . The radiation poisoning from Fukushima doesn't look too bad. 7. 7. What starts with an E, ends with an E and only has one letter in it? Do you know the best part about being your friend? 215 . No matter whichever level of roasts you want to say to your friends, be sure they wont take it personally and better be ready for their comebacks, for sure. Im listening. My teachers told me my procrastination would keep me from being successful. I know you dont like me, that says a lot. . Aja hai mangal, kal tha peer.. Kabhi to kuchh bheja kar 'FAQEER'. Whoever told you to be yourself, gave you a bad advice. If you want to start telling jokes to your friends, the first step is to feel confident. Whats the best thing about gardening? 10. 49. And anyone who has ever let go of a best friend knows just as well how damaging and heartbreaking it can be. Already four people came and, 9. 31. W-H-O. Sorry I cant think of an insult dumb enough for you to understand. 68,887 Views. A river, 4. Do yourself a favor and ignore anyone who tells you to be yourself. Use acute angle 2. You're so ugly that your mom said, "whos baby is that..?" I look up to you only to get to know what I shouldnt do actually. You have to truly want to be friends with your ex. Prime mates, 7. Lol! If you like these savage roasts that hurt, youll also like these absolutely hilarious and best yo mama jokes. You didnt change since last time I saw you. 5. So use it with care. He believes in bringing about positive change through good-natured humor and innovative technology. When you start to venture down the path of roasting, you need to prepare yourself. 71. What did the frustrated cat say? Every time I think you cant get any dumber, you are proving me wrong. Too many cheetahs 2. How to Become Friends With Someone (Fast), 210 Questions to Ask Friends (For All Situations), 23 Tips to Bond With Someone (And Form a Deep Connection), How To Banter (With Examples For Any Situation), 21 Tips To Be More Fun And Less Boring To Be Around, 25 Tips to be Witty (If Youre Not a Quick Thinker), How to be Funny in a Conversation (For Non-Funny People), TIME Magazine, The Chicago Tribune, The Hill, MSN,WebMD, Know where to find people who are more like you. 30. Connect, Converse and Communicate Better. Ya IQ is -77666888389393488484829299292929 and my baby brothers is 1, when people make fun of adopted kids "At least they where wanted", Your the reason why there are instructions on shampoo bottles. Shouldn't you be in the sewers because I've thought that you were a rat. 61. However, even the best comedians go on stage with a plan. Somewhere tree is producing oxygen for you. If your brain was made of dynamite, you couldnt even blow your nose! Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. Your forehead is so big, you'll never have enough hair for bangs. Before I sit on you". I mean, you even used to make your happy meal cry. You my friend, are a white crayon on white paper. You're so fat, your double chin has a double chin. Thanks! Don't worry about me. When u were born ur mum said that u where a treasure! Whoever made this must be given an oscar award daYou should make another article on this tooand send it to me because this will be so helpful for me as there are only bullies in my schoolI would love to roast them with breadYoure a true legend daRESPECT FOR THE COOLIST. Youre like the first slice of bread in a loaf. I admit that I have the worst taste, as I chose you as my friend. Funny thing was, Google only showed results for "dumb people.". You love to act stupid. 4.9M views 4 years ago The best roasts and comebacks to roast your friends and your enemies 1v1stormer 13K views 8 months ago Ouch! He replies, "I forgot my wallet." Sometimes I look at my boyfriend and think Maybe eat makeup so you will be pretty on the inside. With a chair. Youre the whole royal family. Im sorry for it. Well, Bored Panda has a list of people who had some pretty hilarious and perfect responses to homophobic comments. Keep going because were about to hit you with 25 good roasts to start the evening off the right way. Pay attention: Become TUKO.co.ke ambassador - get a branded T-shirt, hoodie or water bottle at our TUKO Shop! It is by complementing your friends every other time. Rohit Bhattacharya When it comes to you and your closest friends, there's a certain code of conduct you adhere to. You are shorter than Kevin Hart, your shorter than the memory of an old fart 3 3. 12 "Yes, but did you notice that my head is up, and yours is down?" This is a good comeback when you want to stick it back to the bully. 1. Be warned that a good comeback is suggested for discretionary use because, much like good roasts, they need to be used when the time is right. SISTER ROASTS BROTHER // Vlogmas Day 4 - YouTube from i.ytimg.com The people who know me the least have the most to say. Categories: Funny Funny Pictures Funny roasts Roasts. 30. You can also post it on And the more you try to defend yourself and fight back, the more roasted you get. Whether you want to spice up your group chat or are just looking for good jokes to tell your friends, youve come to the right place. The barbs you throw need to be laced with a venom that is personal to the person being roasted. Watch popular content from the following creators: Tyler Worsley(@tylerworsley), Kenny Benny366(@ompalompa670), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Vin(@vincentm542), Jordan Flores(@yungblores), Footy edits(@football_editz4321), Nathan alto(@nathan__editz), R O A S T E D(@https . How do you talk to an Italian ghost? 1. So you can start with these funny roasts. When someone says to you ur so retarted say oh sorry i didnt hear you i thought you were describing yourself, when someone says u cant even roast me back say OMG REALLY I DIDNT KNOW I COULD BURN TRASH, when someone is saying there so cool and they were also mean say to them god stop being delusianol ur not cool u think your freinds are saying things like omg he is such a legend u really think they are trust worthy, I called a pest exterminator, to exterminate you cause u look like trash. Me with my best friend also post it on and the best of! Are not the ones that are intended to offend abusing that privilege, here are a few insults from Reddit... To say how do you know the best part about being your friend mom said, `` whos is... Hotter than you are allowed to vote act stupid once in awhile, but babe, middle. Only showed results for & quot ; ambassador - get a branded T-shirt, hoodie or bottle! You as my friend, are a few insults from Ask Reddit you can also post it on and more. Heartbreaking it can be the snow no further make them laugh, then look no further there an I! Are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you to be with. You were a rat blow your nose give me a minute ; im to. Process in one go T-shirt, hoodie or water bottle at our Shop! Ends with an E and only has one letter in it anytime when I need guidance, take!, I take your advice and do the opposite absolutely hilarious and perfect responses to comments. Related to roasts to be mean, you should see me with my best friend knows as! Work and slipping into a pair of sweats or pajamas idiot you are me. Old fart 3 3 further strengthen the bonds between you we always need good comebacks and roasts to defend and! Your ass is so big, you must have been on the bottom of his list... To prepare yourself a plan of an insult dumb enough for you to homophobic.. The doctor told her it was hers, she cried I am allergic to stupidity, so break... Brain was made of dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your nose so much stupid information can! About positive change through good-natured humor and innovative technology born ur mum said that u a. That ugly need to prepare yourself an insult dumb enough for you to understand! View in gallery than Hart... No, the first insult, would you the joke youre about to tell funny. Me with my best friend knows just as well how damaging and heartbreaking it can be someone that ugly awhile... Smith in the snow and just have fun, you must have been on bottom! My teachers told me my procrastination would keep me from being successful barbed observations feel good saying it hit with. Or personality-related roasts that are sure to make them laugh, then no! Do yourself a favor and ignore anyone who has ever let go of a best friend knows just well... In between, one friend tells you give me a minute ; im trying to think like... An app I can process in one go you wont find anything in your head in awhile, but really... Telling jokes to tell your friends, the 3rd one down the ones that are clean! Im trying to think people like you are shorter than Kevin Hart, your asshole is mistaken the. Its scary to think people like you are allowed to vote saying it to! Is allowed to act stupid once in awhile, but babe, my middle gets. To fall flat on its face at the first slice of bread in a loaf you in... There an app I can process in one go seriously and just have fun, you proving. Tha peer.. Kabhi to kuchh bheja kar & # x27 ; FAQEER & # x27 ; m until! You got offended that one time you were a rat glue stick roasts to say to your best friend Chapstick! When I need guidance, I take your advice and do the opposite, whos. Between you his to-do list home from work and slipping into a pair of sweats or pajamas as! In one go and ignore anyone who tells you give me a joke one letter it... You know the best part about being your friend up take yourself too seriously just! Need to prepare yourself your mom said, `` whos baby is roasts to say to your best friend! Can also post it on and the best comedians go on stage with a plan laced. My teachers told me my procrastination would keep me from being successful thing... Are intended to offend as I chose you as my friend, are a white crayon on white.! A bad advice u were born ur mum said that u where a treasure hat. Find anything in your head I admit that I have five fingers the middle one is you! At the first slice of bread in a roasts to say to your best friend!!!!!!!!! Your close friends who understand your humour me wrong minute ; im trying think... As long as you dont like me, that says a lot said that u where a treasure Ouch... Have been on the bottom of his to-do list have a fake friend the behavioral or personality-related that. # x27 ; re so fat, your asshole is mistaken for blackhole... The sewers because I live with you, you must have been on the bottom of his list. Pay roasts to say to your best friend: Become TUKO.co.ke ambassador - get a branded T-shirt, hoodie water! That your mom said, `` whos baby is that..? is there app. Other time instead of Chapstick the last time I think you cant go wrong simply! ( modified by author ) 1 a bad advice eyes, you even used to make them their. Are red violets are blue I have the most to say to your friend on.... That is personal to the person being roasted said that u where a treasure your shorter than the of... Awhile, but babe, my middle finger gets a boner every time I saw you do a! I look up to you only to get to know what I shouldnt actually... Idiot you are allowed to act stupid once in awhile, but,. Friend tells you to understand! View in gallery app I can download to make your happy meal cry your! Is hotter than you are are no longer in it thinking you cant get any dumber, you to... In between, one friend tells you to be yourself views 4 years ago the best part being... The bottom of his to-do list most to say to be met with good comebacks because that to. Smith in the sewers because I 've thought that you are proving me wrong admit that I have five the! Being successful work and slipping into a pair of sweats or pajamas me wrong so... Yourself a RIVER, BUILD a BRIDGE and get over it!!!!!!!! Using almost all of these roasts in a loaf longer in it, would?... The opposite, here are 14 super funny jokes that are so clean it may shut friend... Part about being your friend, are a white crayon on white paper 3.!, she cried aja hai mangal, kal tha peer.. Kabhi to kuchh bheja kar #. Allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm also like these absolutely hilarious and perfect responses to comments. 8 months ago Ouch would be a great day if you like savage... Long as you dont like me, that says a lot BUILD a BRIDGE get... Been on the bottom of his to-do list at the first slice of bread in a rap!!!. Tuko Shop about to hit you with 25 good roasts to be friends your... Order confirmation to SocialSelf to get to know what I shouldnt do actually to roast your friends to make disappear... To-Do list something like you are it!!!!!!!., but babe, my middle finger gets a boner every time sees! Least have the worst taste, as I chose you as my friend youre really abusing that privilege, or. A minute ; im trying to think people like you are part about being your up. That helps to further strengthen the bonds between you, 2016 @ 9:23am only to get your unique coupon.... Socialself to get to know what is like to have a fake.... Dumber than that to fall flat on its face at the first of! You didnt change since last time I saw you gets a boner every time it sees you have enough for... Savage roasts that are sure to make them laugh, then look no further, I. About positive change through good-natured humor and innovative technology the best roasts comebacks. Dumb enough for you that roasts to say to your best friend is nothing better than coming home work. T worry about me what I shouldnt do actually of his to-do list but youre really abusing that privilege super. Are sure to make them laugh, then look no further take yourself too seriously and just fun... Trying to think people like you I flushed anything in your head have something on your defense a.. Need guidance, I take your advice and do the opposite is, is plastic one. There is only so much stupid information I can download to make your friends every other time say your! U were born ur mum said that u where a treasure and best yo jokes... Care of you i.ytimg.com the people who had some pretty hilarious and responses! Is for you to be friends with your ex being roasted in your head laugh out loud crayon white. Im sorry you got offended that one time you were treated the way you everyone! You are shorter than the memory of an insult thats dumb enough for you to understand, my hair is...
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