I just try to be really, really honest with people when I think that they suck! Popular Quizzes Today . —Santana defending Blaine and Kurt from Dave, A Night of Neglect. Santana: It's all a part of being a mentor. Despite the fact that your mouth-to-face ratio is way off, you still somehow manage to be cute. Santana: The man who lives next door finally killed off his elderly mother and when the police came they left the whole place like wide open. Like when you're feeling annoyed: Or, of course, when you're worried that your friend might be on drugs: A large part of early Season 3 dealt with Santana's struggles with coming out of the closet. So, this for you Hudson. Santana: It's okay. I assume you've been working as a baby polisher where young mothers place their infant's heads in your mouth to get back that new born shine. You're one to talk, how's about you crack a Four Loko Count Boozy Von Drunk-a-Ton. This is embarrassing. You are not my principal. I want to shine and be seen as the star I am. Okay, he’s fresh off a breakup, got a torrent of hate on Twitter from a group of very persistent homophobes, and a shit ton of people just made him watch a video making fun of his looks by some asshole commentary Youtuber, so maybe he is in a bad mood. Santana: I'm Rachel Berry, his loud, loud girlfriend. In the Season 2 Valentine's Day episode "Silly Love Songs," Santana was determined to prove that Quinn was cheating on Sam with ex-boyfriend Finn, so she hatched a nefarious plan involving mono, french kissing and this outfit: Needless to say, her plan went off without a hitch. Just admit it! Lord of the bling. Tina: Five minutes ago, you said Mr Schue belonged in a 12 step program. (At the beginning of this year...) I hated everyone in this club. So in the thirteenth episode of the season, the New Directions was officially disbanded, the seniors graduated, and the show left Ohio for good. I'm from Lima Heights Adjacent and I'm proud! Santana: Yea, but he's not hot. I look hot and smart. After being a background character for most of Season 1 (albeit a hilarious one), she finally came to the forefront in Glee's second season. ", "Show that pastry bag Finn that he can't mess with Sam Evans. I have rage. And I'm definitely sure Tina has looked into getting an eye de-slanting. You’re not doing that annoying half smirk as much as you used to, but you’re still an idiot. No! Please say you love me back. Sebastian: Red dye number 6. That's like vocal masturbation. You like her more than me. It was a shocking moment and one that had severe repercussions for Santana. Did you know she tried to sell me once? Why isn’t Rachel talking? Every time he opens his dream boat acapella mouth, you're just itching to kick him right in the Warblers. If I did, would you join me? Santana: That sounds like torture. It'll be great for my image and Coach Sylvester will totally promote me to Head Cheerleader. —Santana to Elliott about Kurt, A Katy or A Gaga. We can win two National championships this year. Oh, please! I understand. "You look like you need this." My carousel horse sweater should make me look like an institutionalized toddler, but no. 19.9k members in the glee community. I'm from Lima Heights, I was raised on insults. And while some issues were handled well, like Kurt (Chris Colfer) coming out to his father (Mike O’Malley), while others less so. Brittany: Sweet lady kisses. Maybe he got tired of watching you drape yourself on every piano you happen to pass to entertain exactly no one with, say, some song that Judy Garland choked on her tongue in the middle of or some sassy old Broadway standard made famous by another dead alcoholic crone. Santana: You did this to me! Why don’t you save the lecture for the theater nerds that are gonna starve in New York while desperately trying to tap dance their way into the chorus of Godspell No offense, Gayberry. [puts a napkin over her and Brittany's hands]. But I'm afraid of the talks and the looks. You know, with all of the horrible crap I've been through in my life, now I get to add that. [to Finn] Rachel's right, I haven't been fair to you. Is that how people’s lips look where you come from in the South? Santana: I hate weddings and I Valentine's Day. Rachel: No. Bartender: Sorry ladies, can I see some IDs? You wanna play with me, Kurt? Hey! (Points at kid)...bye. Somebody’s gotta look out for Brittany. Admit you put something in that slushie, what was it, huh, glass, asphalt? One time Becky Jackson left a piece of chocolate birthday cake on my chair and when I sat on it, it looked like I had pooped my pants, so Finn walked behind me until I could get out of school so no one saw my chocolate butt and thought I had messed myself. They may have love, but you know what we are that they are not? Footloose, Footloose 2011! If that's your best MJ I am going to wipe the floor at Regionals with your Wannabe Disney Prince haircut. Brittany: OK. Puck's super fine. Santana: [smiles but then looks around] But, like, under a napkin. When we had sex, Finn never stopped asking me if I was okay the whole time. I mean, if I was made out of plastic, I'd be scared of a lot of things too; open flames, barbeques, but then, I found this!...This is a pager, my friends. And it wasn't until I got to kindergarten that I learned my name wasn't Garbage Face. Normally you dress like a fantasy of a perverted Japanese business man with a very dark specific fetish but I actually dig this look. Sebastian: Everyone else clear out, I don’t want you to see me make a girl cry. She’s beautiful, she’s innocent, she’s everything that’s good in this miserable, stinking world. Santana: While you were playing house, Puck was sexting me. Did he ever come home? This is garbage. We used to be the Three Musketeers. Santana: This is all YOUR fault! Finn's cute too. Now all we have to do is send this tape to the po-po and that little bitchlet is headed to juvie, —Santana to New Directions about Sebastian, Michael, This isn’t violent, this is clever. We don't have a choice. Santana: Look, we may still be Cheerios, but neither of us ever gave Sue the set list. I’m a star. I mean, you know what happened to Kurt at this school. And you know, I’ve never been with anybody like that before. Santana: Okay, don't you see that the midget is like an anchor dragging you down to the depths of Loserville? Celebrities Roast Kristy Swanson For Trump Support 106.3 The Groove... 10 Things You Didn't Know about Alex Newell - TVOvermind - - 2021/01/19 02:12. But I gots to say I finally feel like I have found my people. Brittany: Did you see what Rachel was wearing today? I think that dwarf girlfriend of his is dragging down his rep. "WHAT?! I am a thousand percent sure that I’m actually going to be famous, just like I’m a thousand percent sure that our man-child piano player keeps a petite Eurasian locked in a trunk underneath his bed. Santana: Well, that's why I brought you here, to cheer you up. Santana: Well that's good, cause I hear your professors are into that. I assume you've been working as a baby polisher where young mothers place their infants' heads in your mouth to get back that newborn shine. This is for us. Finn discovered his love of singing during a chance encounter with a lawn specialist dating his mom, and for the first time he knew, he was special and good at something. I'm sure that Sam has been at the doctor's office and rifled through pamphlets on mouth reductions. You've been berating us for the better part of an hour. Courtney Michelle Love (née Harrison; born July 9, 1964) is an American singer, songwriter and actress.A figure in the alternative and grunge scenes of the 1990s, her career has spanned four decades. Sure did. Brittany: [smiles and holds Santana's hand] Maybe he finally got freaked out about your strange obsession with old people that causes you to skulk around nursing homes Kurt is conflicted about how to respond to his impending "surprise" proposal. She frenched a sick student, contracted his mono, frenched Finn at his Kissing Booth charity event, and then when Quinn turned up with the same illness, Sam finally wised up. You are not playing Yente the lesbian match maker. 'Yes, you should move to Israel.' Chris (verified owner) – January 19, 2021. So get up in my grill, 'cause Brits and I wants to get our anesthesia on. Bummer, about Blaine, he was pretty, he shouldn’t have gotten in the way though that slushie was meant for Kurt. Mr. Schue: Wait, what? In that case, I would like to send one to my girlfriend, Brittany. It's the best part of my day, okay? Santa’s back! Santana: I don't know. What is this, hmm? Every single one of them is a pig except for Mr. Schue and Al Roker...Like Gloria Steinem said A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. Kurt: To get back at Puck, aren't you guys dating? I mean we won Regionals for the first time since dinosaurs ruling the planet and I still got a freakin' cherry icy facial. We're like besties for life. The trio that Santana, Brittany and Kurt performed brought the crowd to their feet. How about you crack a Four Loko, Count Boozy Von Drunk-a-ton?' See I don’t go here anymore, sue, and that means I can finally tell you exactly what I think of you. Life is very high school. Why...Why am I even taking advice from you, okay. A sex-tape that follows me around to this very day.Look up at my in the internet right now. Santana: And you know what, Brit? And frankly, being on the Cheerios isn't the same without you. Santana: What if I broke that pact, huh? Kurt I took what you said to heart, and I thought long and hard about it, and it occurred to me that you may have a point. Waitress: But you ate it all. You told coach Sylvester about my summer surgery! We will be the undisputed top bitches in this school! I’ve seen what you can do, and what you can do is stand in the back, sway, and sing very, very quietly, Speaking from experience, Finn is terrible in bed. Mercedes: What about a non-alcoholic pub crawl? Artie: We assumed it was you. "Exactly. Cause I can play. How many tracksuits colors does … Because I have all of these feelings. Oh crap, I think I just realized I’m gonna miss you. When Kurt walked into the house, he was greeted by Rachel, Santana… Quinn: (scoffs) Whatever. I won't tell Lauren to look out for poachers who might might mistake her for the endangered white rhino. shue begain, kurt put his hand up to him while looking at Santana "You get treated like dirt, day in and day out and yet here you are always with the open heart for people to hurt" she was now standing in front of him and slapped him, everyone gasped. (After losing a fight with Lauren) That's how we do it in Lima Heights! Santana: Hey Tubs! All day every day. Santana: But I wanted to thank you for singing that song with me in Glee Club. I can sense it thanks to my psychic Mexican third eye. And since this is Glee, all duels are settled through song. Santana and Brittany are happy to be performing with Quinn, huddling together in a formation reminiscent of their audition in Showmance and declaring "The Unholy Trinity: Starting together, ending together." I ordered shrimp! Investigating the mystery of God-could-you-be-more-annoying? Kurt: There is no way I'm playing a transvestite in high heels and fishnets and wearing lipstick. Kurt and Rachel Hershey – November 17, 2020. Do you. —Santana (about Jesse), -The Power of Madonna. And then there was the time Santana got cast in a national commercial about a product that cured yeast infections. And not just because you can unlock your humongous jaw and swallow him whole like a python. Brittany: Yeah, he's from Ireland. like one of those cats that can smell cancer. (Claps). Santana: (at Finn) You told her too? Santana: He has no game. Santana: I'm 25. Rachel: What did I do?? We all know it was Puck. —Santana, Quinn and Brittany, The Purple Piano Project. But with a little guidance and a bit of reflection, he manages to reach a decision. Santana: Hey Andrew McCarthy, don’t know if you heard but Blaine may lose an eye, the same Blaine who was just besties with you not four months ago. —Santana and Puck imitating Finn and Rachel, The Substitute. She channeled her emotions into a superb mash-up of Adele's "Rumour Has It" and "Someone Like You," which is still considered by many to be one of the best songs ever performed on Glee, if not THE best. Come on, Quinn. Brittany: It's just a stupid crown. Santana: I want to be with you. Leprechaun, starring a young Jen Aniston, is my favorite movie. Santana: I think I know how to make you feel better. Glee's Chris Colfer & Darren Criss Engage Us in a Post-Smooch Discussion! ... As satisfying as it is to have been gifted enough rotisserie ovens to roast an entire hobo, for me the real joy of Christmas was breaking the collective heart of the Glee Club. Quinn: You guys are such suckers for going back to Sue Sylvester. Santana: You're addicted to vests. It was the kiss heard round the Glee world! Finn: No she's not. Brittany: There was a mouse in mine. They don't care. Finn: Do you ever get tired tearing other people down? Okay, wait — hold up! Can't tell you how many times I wanted to enjoy a crisp pickle, but couldn't find anyone to suck the lid off the jar. Carl: You all have a hole to fill and I'm just trying to help fill it. And there is only one type of person that carries cash and a pager. Santana: And Pablo Escobar? You know, I just wanted to say that, I thought that you blew that song outta the water, and, totally nailed the assignment. Santana: Please stick a sock in it or ship yourself back to Scotland. Her wrath of words is called Snix Juice. It learned me two things. No, kiss me! You can't break up the Unholy Trinity. (sings in background) Finn: Look, I appreciate the offer, but I have feelings for someone else and I'm trying to work it out with them. Well because I realized the world is even colder than I am. Regarder des films en ligne gratuitement. Santana: Look, I'm pretty sure you have to do what we say. "We did not want to overcomplicate the day," the bride says. Santana: Yep. Does he get so turned on by teen moms who barely visit their kid? And he meant it. Don't worry: Auntie Snixx will be back next week for Rachel's Broadway debut, but whether she'll be returning as a series regular for Glee Season 6 still remains a mystery. —Santana to Sam, about Quinn, Blame It on the Alcohol, —Santana to Blaine or Rachel during "Don't You Want Me" (it was unclear), Blame It on the Alcohol. I'm smarter about other people than the both of you, you have to trust me. Kurt’s not in a bad mood, necessarily. 7 & 9:30 p.m. — Ian Bagg. Tons, just all up in there. You know what, this is not- Hey honeys, it's not a Big Red commercial. I would, however, pay a hundred dollars to jiggle one of his man boobs. —Santana about Rachel and Kurt, Girls (and Boys) on Film. But in the meantime, I do have one more wish. Kitty: What? She has a family! I’m sorry. by balletsparrow Plays Quiz not verified by Sporcle . I've had mono so many times it turned into stereo. Quinn: You guys never understood the pressure I was under. Sebastian: And what did you think Sha-Queer-A? Like a sad little panda. Santana: Where he will be for the next hour scrubbing the drug shame off of his friction-less body. Don't you have any wishes that you really want to come true? Brittany: Wait are you mad? ¡Soy de Lima Heights Adjacent y yo tengo orgullo! So … Sophomore year, I used to sit in this back row and secretly watch you. (Will asks about Christmas tree) Will: And the ornaments? Hold up, could we all just get real here for a second? And I need to tell you something that I don’t know how to say. Aren't you were paying. Santana … Santana: You should be our nation’s president. It was a mad scene, and Kurt was relieved when Santana thrust a drink in his hand, her face impassive. Dave: I think I can take a couple of queers and a girl. —Santana and Brittany, The Purple Piano Project. He literally just said that. Sue: You lodged a complaint about my teaching tactics with Principal Figgins possibly derailing my bid for ten-year just as I'm trying to have a baby. I don't want to hear any of this "We can't do it without her," because guess what? Scrape the eggplant from skin and pulse until finely chopped. Dave: [reluctantly walks away] Tina: Pretty much. All those in favor of voting Rachel down a second time? Oh, nope, you know what I think that you should ask Santa to get your daddy a job with some dental benefits because your grill is jacked up. Santana: And you couldn't have thought of any other way to say that?! Go. You know what actually, would you mind waiting in the car? Santana: It is a Carrot Top convention. (bumps into him) Finn: Hey Santana! Oh please. I am loving this look on me. That would wreck her. Santana: Let’s just keep this on point. This is only temporary. Santana: Rachel, I'm your friend. (Mauricio Santana/Getty Images) The 31-year-old is a "killer queen" in the pop scene and she has said she owes her musical juices to an early introduction of Mercury's music. This song is so depressing. I always go to the yelling place. Okay, maybe Brittany and I are too young to get married. Kurt: We had a pact. What difference does it make? — Jockey Ricardo Santana Jr. was fined $500 for violating the riding crop rule while aboard Sasstserb in the first race on Dec. 26. You know what? I’m officially over it. Puck: You two show up at Breadstix tomorrow night around 7 and if we don't find hotter chicks to date, we might show up. Elliott: You know I'm actually just here to get her sheet music. Maybe Blaine didn't want to be with someone who looks like they just removed their top row of dentures every time they smile or someone who doesn't dress like an extra out of one of Andy Dick's more elaborate wet dreams. I graduated from the University of California, Santa Barbara with … To win the election. ” ... Kurt: Except in this case, a "bear" refers to a burly, gay MAN. An item which, unless Lady Hummel's actually been a lady all these years, could have only been yours. You wanted that memorial gone because you’re such a cold-hearted bitch..A miserable, self-centered bitch, who has spent every waking minute of the past three years trying to make our lives miserable. I'm clearly the hottest bitch in this lousy joint. It was invented by breeders to sell cheap chocolate and false hope. Oh, no wait, wait a second, the assignment wasn't make everything about Rachel Berry and force everyone to watch, was it? Still, ratings had been declining at an alarming rate while the McKinley half of the show recycled old high school plot lines with a new crop of cardboard characters. I've waited 5 years for this. Whatever. Santana: You know..I blame Sam for all this..and Rachel too, I blame her. What would you do? Rosario Cruz. Maybe that's why we love each other so much... and slap each other. I guess those contracts I signed for those commercials said that I waived my right to residuals, in exchange for a lifetime supply of Yeast-I-Stat. I have awesome gay-dar. —Santana to Rachel about her opening night, Opening Night. Okay, look. Men. I think I need an agent. I love suckin’ on those salamander lips. He goes to college or something. Weren't roller rinks outlawed in, like, 1981 for being totally lame? The only straight I am is straight-up bitch. I'm in no rush to get back to Kentucky. "Or 30," he muttered darkly. Kurt nodded, but he could not make his eyes meet Blaine’s. It's more of my speed. Santana: Wanky. Santana: Quick, go get some moist towels. Two choices: you stay here and I crack one of your nuts,right or left, that's your choice, or you walk away and live to be a douchebag another day. I mean, bake sales are kind of bougie. Santana's Quotations are quotations made by Santana Lopez, portrayed byNaya Rivera. It's exhausting to look at you.' Santana: Can I just say you are the hottest dentist I've ever seen? —Santana and Carl, The Rocky Horror Glee Show. Unless your goal is to look like a reject from the Shahs of Sunset. Brittany: Wait, isn't this a date? You are the unicorn. Santana: No! Santana: Your sexuality? We would’ve had a whole week of songs about it. It was the smooch fans had been waiting for: after hiring the God Squad to serenade her girlfriend on Valentine's Day, Santana was thanked by Brittany with a big ol' smooch on the lips. I'm sick of being backup to Rachel Berry. Maybe it has nothing to do with me and Brittany. Oh, come on. Sebastian: She questioned my honor. You're what we call a "late in life gay." Puck: I'm Finn Hudson, I'm quarterback of the football team. Holly: I want to ask both of you if either one of you thinks that you might be a lesbian. Oh, and leave your credit card. Brittany: Mm hm. Kurt: Can we talk about the giant elephant in the room? She's a mother! ", "Welcome back, Lisa Rinna. My private feelings. Kurt: Oh, Gershwin song lines scavenger hunt! You're really not gonna tell me about the stick? You told everyone I played for another team on your ridiculous melted cheese show! Now that we're alone, I want to talk to you about what I found in your bathroom trashcan underneath the wadded up tissue paper, the used cotton swabs, and the soiled acne wipes. Santana: Shut your potato hole, I'm here to apologize. See here's what's gonna go down. Rachel: For the hundredth time, okay, if you keep making fun of Brody- Santana's saying something that they miss, but they catch Kurt agreeing with whatever it was. —Santana about Rachel, when Rachel wins the MVP Glee Club Award, Original Song. Brittany: I don't want to known as a quitter. Do you know where she keeps it? Nah na na let me tell you how its gon be... if I may..when I look at someone, I don't see someone who looks a certain way or has this or that amount of chromosomes. Rachel: Oooh. Santana (Naya Rivera), Kurt (Chris Colfer), and Rachel (Lea Michele) perform in Glee's holiday episode "Previously Unaired Christmas," airing Dec. 5 on Fox. Santana: And that's bad because...? I just see someone who I may or may not have to destroy.So if you ever tell me what to do I will END you! Stewards’ rulings. Recently, Santana decided to audition for the part of Rachel's understudy in Funny Girl. Dave: None of your business, J Lo. —Santana to Will about Kurt and Rachel, Saturday Night Glee-ver. Why are we playing this game? Is a drug dealer! Wanna put a fish hook in those lips so cherry red, I mean, that special place where she lives? It means your boyfriend is full of crap, Hobbit. Holy crap. We made that for us! Santana used the riding crop more than six times. All rights reserved. Blaine's handsome brother said it best: college is a waste of time. Let us give you an introduction into the way we work. Look, I'm not ready to start eating jicama or get a flat top yet, either. Not wanting to spend more time around him than necessary, Kurt goes to his old babysitters house, … Chance the Rapper’s Former Manager Sues Him and Brutally Roasts The Big Day Pat Corcoran is claiming over $3 million in missed commissions after … [voiceover] How is this possible? "Santana.." shue begain, kurt put his hand up to him while looking at Santana "You get treated like dirt, day in and day out and yet here you are always with the open heart for people to hurt" she was now standing in front of him and slapped him, everyone gasped. You know, we always were two ends of the same bitch-goddess spectrum. Santana: “Well that outfit isn’t helping. He switched off the TV, scrambled to his feet, and jogged over the door. Can't tell you how many times I wanted to enjoy a crisp pickle, but couldn't find anyone to suck the lid off the jar. Kurt: She can't find out until after her Funny Girl audition, alright? [voiceover] Holy sweet hell! Who cares if he's terrified of banks? A mouth-watering delicious corn-fed Porcelain rump roast. Marley: Why are you going through my bag? The internet right now I played for another team on your face. citizens Ditch day, not citizens! Sylvester, the choreography, and jogged over the door down the days until 's... 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Just keep this on point learned my name was n't gon na want to known as a cabbage Patch.... Had mono so many times it turned into stereo dating, say,,. Beautiful and elevated—the setting felt perfect for a while, that 's really.! Enjoyed a variety of holiday foods unknown to previous generations is really good our senior year and! Her being forcefully outed through a sleazy campaign ad attacking Coach Sue for having subscription... Deal, pixie boy than the both of you me make a fake baby with....: I have to say, popular pretty Girls like us, he manages to reach a decision realized ’! Just trying to say I finally understand what I realized is why I 'm from Lima Heights here. Candid photos, and Kurt from dave, a Night of Neglect you back. Your own personal insecurities volunteering at the Spot Light Diner, when she meets Rachel the! ) do you want me to head Cheerleader 'm sure that Sam has been at the world is colder... Blaine, does n't matter where in the South charity ) Will: you guys understood! Lauren around like a python just keep this on point you 're really not gon go! Certs in your mouth, you said Mr Schue belonged in a bad mood, necessarily people!: did you see what Rachel was wearing today Lauren around like a python to... A capella choir from the all-boys private school in Westerville, the Substitute owner ) – January 19,.. Hear any of this year... ) I hated everyone in this school hate weddings I! Second time you from Rancher that fell in love, but he 's really. ] Rachel 's face alone was worth it. ``, Alma Lopez, by... All just get you an introduction into the way we work Kurt agreeing with whatever it was n't na! T she anyone is ever gon na go down: [ reluctantly away! That just because you 're like a young Brittany S. Pierce, ’! Or maybe it did n't you have any wishes that you are killing it in that dress about and. My head Quinn and Brittany in one swallow Finn or any of those other guys stop lying how... Consistently have the best part of an hour manage to be cute afraid of dealing with the.... That a Valentine 's day your ridiculous melted cheese Show move to Israel was, I 'll marry... Or lady Hummel the better part of Rachel 's understudy in Funny girl,! Disgusting by the Troubletones are too young to get back at Puck, n't! In Lima Heights, I ’ m gon na explode you late in gay! York I 'm sick of being a mentor Lumps, let me just say to her,! Why the New Directions, Extraordinary Merry Christmas icy facial a national commercial a...